Parent Survival Tactics 101

PARENTING IS NOT FOR WIMPS (or the faint of heart)! When you listen to your teenager do you sometimes wonder, "What was I thinking?" Does your elementary school child come home with math homework you've never seen? And do you sometimes stare up at the ceiling late at night hearing a wee small voice in your head, "He or she is just like me...only better...the new improved version! Do you then experience a sensation of fear? Be courageous. Parenting is an endless adventure. No Wimps allowed!

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Why I Scrapbook...

My latest diversion is Scrapbook production...I can't rely on my children to keep my mind sharp in my golden years. Generally, they've ensured it's pretty cloudy now. I need to have a really good record to look at - something with journal notes. Something about my children - the ones who already spent their inheritance and their sibling's too! Oh yeah...all of them did! My scrapbook will be a reminder of which child is most likely to play out their revenge because I punished them when they were eight years old. Yeah...which one was that? And it will help me cherish the moments when they were babes in arms. Who is this photo of? Okay well at least I'll have the vacation photos to enjoy! What does this ticket stub go to?

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The Hardest Work You'll Ever Do!

Being a parent is the most diverse educational challenge anyone can sign up for! It's fraught with joy and sorrow, failure and success, excitement and boredom. It's also been the most time consuming, terrifying, and expensive! Now that I've been in this career field awhile, I've determined that everything you really need to know in life was discovered by a mother. And if she didn't discover it - she perfected it!

Teaching another human being to be self-sufficient, have personal motivation and ensure their own safety is no cake walk! Eventually they come to realize that "Mom" can fix anything with whatever is within her reach, no matter where she is at the moment. And then they respect you. This insight is limited however, because children of any age are unable to process, "I said, NO!" without an exasperating struggle. When this happens, then they don't respect you anymore!

Then they become teenagers and it's obvious you have taught them nothing! LOL

It was easier to deal with a toddler than a teenager? The terrible twos, the trying threes, the terrifying teens! Puleese! There is no comparison. My sister-in-law recommends putting up photos of the little darlings when they were younger as a reminder that we love them...even like them on occasion!

They were so much easier to like a few years ago - you just picked them up and removed them to the isolation of the time out area! Now they think they can time YOU out by going to their room and shutting the door!

Useful advice would be, "practice saying I love you and work on your smile." That way you'll present a better image while your teenager is insulting your intelligence! You say, "Is that a love bite!" and the explanation is, "No it's not! My friend kicked me in the neck while we were wrestling." Someone give me a mirror I want to see if I look that stupid! The more I hear "it's true!" the more I think we need an esophageal x-ray to make sure there isn't any damage!

I have learned so much from my children. For instance, the pleasure of a long bath behind a locked door with the radio turned up! And, Technological appreciation (with that I-pod in their ears I don't have to listen to that racket they call "music"). We don't want to forget Geo-cashing (there's nothing better than a hidden locator they didn't know about)!

Save Me From Myself...

In the midst of the demanding family, "Mom" often forgets that she was an individual with likes and dislikes; hobbies; goals; and interests long before she was someone's wife, someone's mother or someone's employee.

I forget in about a minute because, well...I lost my memory about five years ago when a raging hot flash washed it away in a puddle of perspiration! But I recently discovered I had a passport and my photo was the only one in it! I also, discovered I can go away and my children, the dog, and the husband will be just fine!

I recommend post-it notes strategically placed wherever you'll see them, "Save Me From Myself" should remind you to take care of the caregiver!

Fly fishing and child raising have a lot in common. They both are long processes of learning. They both require a huge amount of patience. Both are taxing on you physically. Both can be quite dangerous (you'd know this if you ever fell in the river without your wader belt on, or were responsible for a energized toddler). Fishing and child raising both make you a tad or more frustrated almost every time you throw yourself at it.

The list of similarities goes on and on until both converge at the same outcome. Eventually, you have to kiss your child, or fish, "good-bye" and turn them loose to live out their lives independently. They will find their own way, or current, and eventually they may even find a mate all by their little lonesome selves. We all hope and pray they are prepared for the obstacles and natural elements they encounter. So here's to the big kiss off! *smooch*

Parent Survival Tactics 101

Preparation For Life!

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Why I Scrapbook...

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